Parenting Visions vs. Parenting Realities

In the picture perfect online world we live in its hard not to get sucked into the notion that everyone else’s lives are running along smoothly while your own is in a state of complete disarray. Photos on blogs, Instagram, Facebook etc. often sugar coat reality and I am completely guilty of this. While on one hand you have a nice picture to add to your family album, on the other hand it makes other parents feel like crap. It’s a vicious cycle of pretending all is well when all you managed was to get a photo before shit hit the fan.

 

So, in the spirit of being completely honest I would like to present to you the ‘behind the scenes’ of a few recent photos I shared on Instagram. My hope is that the following confessions will help me in my quest to realize that life isn’t perfect, kids have their own agendas and its ok when you try and fail miserably.

Example #1 – Christmas cookie decorating

 

 

Vision

We’d make adorable cookies that not only tasted great, but looked good too.

 

Reality

Messy ass cookies with so many toppings they are borderline inedible.

 

Sprinkles got fucking everywhere. Literally I will be finding sprinkles in my kitchen 20 years from now. I guess my brain forgot that toddler fingers are not the same as adult fingers. Toddler fingers are in a constant state of stickiness regardless of if they have just been washed. The result is half the bowl of sprinkles being on their fingers followed by them trying to vigorously remove sprinkles because they don’t like shit on their hands followed by them wiping their fingers on their clothes (staining them, obviously) and finally getting sprinkles in every possible crevasse in your kitchen.

 

Example #2 – Making Christmas ornaments

 

 

Vision

We’d make these adorable snowmen ornaments using Quinn’s handprints. She would be an awesome little helper and bust out 20+ ornaments.

 

Reality

We got through maybe the first 6 ornaments before her attention started waning and rebellious behavior began. Let’s just say we had to get creative with our snowmen and ended up with a few questionable scenes. I again forgot that toddlers don’t have a very long attention span especially when it comes to repetitive tasks.

 

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I should clarify that I’m not blaming Quinn for these failures. I’m totally blaming myself. I should know better than set super high expectations for a two year old. The mind of toddler is geared around one thing and one thing only – having fun. When she stops having fun, she’ll stop the activity. End of story. Lesson learned little person, lesson learned…

I would also like to say that amid the craziness of day-to-day parenting, there are moments of perfection. While rare, I can attest that they do exist.  Those perfect moments tend only to happen when you aren’t planning them, there is no pressure and you just go with it.

This moment was 100% perfect.

 

We were watching Rudolph and she climbed up on me, laid her head down and snuggled for a solid 10 minutes. It’s those moments that make you remember that you aren’t a shitty parent because you lost your cool when sprinkles coated your kitchen. The bottom line is your kid still loves you even though you failed in those other moments.


This cuddle sesh said to me, “keep it up Mom, you’re doing alright.”
Thanks Quinny.

xo, Vicky